120 Opera titles that never made it (page 2)

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Here’s a list of 120 opera titles that didn’t make it past the dress-rehearsal (continued):

  1. Donizetti: Excretia Bogia
  2. Wagner: Parsimonious
  3. Bellini: Poliutio (a murky tale)
  4. Richard Strauss: Salame
  5. Rossini: Fullyramide
  6. Walton: Sir John in Hove
  7. Puccini: Candied Angelica
  8. Sondheim: Onis Todd
  9. Handel: Tamburino
  10. Nyman: The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hag
  11. Shostakovich: Snot
  12. Stravinsky: The moving ho(e)
  13. Britten: The Turn of the IKEA fitment
  14. Mozart: Cozzie, fan, tutu (an opera about ballet)
  15. Weber: Der Freiup
  16. Verdi: I LombardDirecti (the loan arranger)
  17. Verdi (really, it’s too easy): Windy Miller
  18. Mozart: Le Nose di Figaro (It’s in for a long run)
  19. Verdi: The Hilton Otello (a place to lay your head)
  20. Verdi: The Sicilian Vespa (fast, economical and stylish)
  21. Weill: The Rise and Fall of the City of MDF
  22. Berlioz: Beatrice et Benedictine (the sorry tale of a love that tippled over into addiction)
  23. Hindemith: Cardillac Arrest
  24. Rossini: La Cenebuytoletola (following the demise of the rental market)
  25. Britten: Deaf in Venice
  26. Meyerbeer: What’s that din (or Pardon My French)
  27. Busoni: Trainee Nurse Faust (the doktor will be along shortly)
  28. Prokofiev: The Duennythingforcash
  29. Stravinsky: The Fire extinguisher Bird (Health and Safety)
  30. Thomas: Cheese and Ham Omelet
  31. Humperdinck: Hans Werner Henze und Gretel
  32. Weill: Miserable End
  33. Weill: The Seven Deadly Singers
  34. Maxwell Davies: Eight Songs For A Mad Baritone
  35. Ravel: Quinze minutes Espagnole (at time and a half)
  36. Mozart: The UnimpressAria
  37. Lalo: Le Roi D’Yfronts
  38. Rimsky-Korsakov: KönigskinderSurprise (there’s a hidden toy inside each one)
  39. Reimann: Leer (a king with a roving eye)
  40. Donizetti: Lendus di Chamouleather
  41. Wagner: Longandgrim
  42. Verdi: The Scottish Widow Play
  43. Poulenc: Les Mammals de Tiresias (coming soon on ZooTV)
  44. Donizetti: Maria’s Too Hard (the stirring tale of a prizewinning Scottish female boxer)
  45. Rossini: Mose is an Eedjit (a great tenor role)
  46. Bellini: Abnorma (the subject of a Channel Five documentary)
  47. Britten: Noye’s Incontinence
  48. Monteverdi: Orfullo
  49. Dvorak: Rusalkaselzer
  50. Wagner: Siegincarcerated
  51. Richard Strauss: The Talking Woman (well, the Silent Woman is mythological…)
  52. Walton: Sir John in’t Loo
  53. Bellini: Il Piranha (starring Marina Callous)
  54. Massenet: Silk Thaiis
  55. Puccini: Tosser
  56. Verdi: La Travelscrabble
  57. Wagner: Tristan and ‘is older sister
  58. Berg: Catsick
  59. Sullivan: HMRC Pinafore (investigation pending)
  60. Puccini: PerDiem (Touring Dough)

Jeremy Fisher trains singers and performers to find and maintain their best. He’s the author of Successful Singing Auditions, and creator of the Voicebox Videos – featured on the BBC and broadcast to 44,000,000 people. He was commissioned by the DANA Centre at London’s Science Museum to create a video on singing with a camera down his throat. Jeremy is fascinated by bringing technology and innate skill together. http://www.vocalprocess.co.uk